I quit my job

After much deliberation, I quit my job at A–Y. For the purposes of online secrecy, I’ll leave out the company name. I always try to leave on good terms and it certainly feels that way (hopefully). Spending most of my more recent weeks leading up to today sitting around training new hires and not feeling welcomed from management made giving the bad news to my all-too-wonderful co-workers that much easier. I started over a year ago as Spongebob and grew to become Squidward.

Things I won’t miss:

  • terribly long drive to Rancho Cuca-BONGO (at least an hour each way)
  • incredibly lazy and sleepy co-workers (I still don’t know the name of the guy across from me…)
  • terrible terrible management (and when I mean management, I mean one guy)

My opinion of my boss although is pretty high. He was far too kind, understanding, and had my best interest in mind. He personally told me to resign and I was better off elsewhere with the series of cascading issues this company is dealing with.

The real kicker is I have to go back tomorrow to pick up my check and sign exit paperwork. Why this wasn’t mentioned to me during my hour meeting is beyond me. Guess it’s really for the better.

So long and farewell. I always did feel like the odd one out at the office. Boo-hoo.

The Weekend Crew: Tanaya and Tiffany

I can count the number of male friends I have with one hand. My really skinny hands at that.

I naturally seem to get along better with females. There was a certain point passed my sexist misogynistic bro-phase of early adolescence where it occurred to me that much of what guys talk about doesn’t really sit too well with me. That’s not to say there isn’t the usual guy talk at the office, but if anyone mentions to me about video games, guns, and whatever new extreme action packed thing there is right now, frankly, I don’t care. That ceased to amuse me years ago.

I usually meet up with 2 friends (both female, no less), who I affectionately call “the weekend crew.” Over simplifying the complex nature of personalities of people, you can consider them, Tanaya — the tall black girl who has a thing for Asian guys (emphasis), and Tiffany — a short Asian girl with a small voice and usual weekend DD. Fun fact: Tiff is my neighbor around the corner. Small world, right?

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How did we meet? Tanaya crashed my end of the year party for my friend Jack in 2015 at UCSB. Note that she was not invited and proceeded to side-step me as I was out greeting guests at the door. First impressions: Who the f-ck is she? And she seems rude. The rudeness hasn’t changed much. Tanaya and Tiff were neighbors living in Santa Ynez. Naturally, Santa Barbara would unite us together even after we all have graduated.

The Weekend Itinerary

  • go downtown or somewhere in Alhambra or Pasadena
  • visit a bar
  • drink at said bar (emphasis on alcohol)
  • repeat at another bar
  • Tanaya keels over
  • Tiff is the DD
  • repeat next week

Believe me. It’s actually pretty fun.

South Pasadena, I hate you.

I got a parking ticket today! Yippee! Now, I’m out $48 dollars (or slightly over $50 with the bulls-it online processing fee). I’m not even mad actually. It was my fault for not taking into account the time it takes me to walk to my car and for some strange reason today, I parked on an unusually vacant street. I’ll stick to back streets from now on.

Middle finger here y'all
Middle finger here y’all

Fun fact: it’s only my second ever parking violation. Guess I was due? Times like this I’m glad it’s the end of the year and money is somewhat less of an issue. I’m just looking forward to Halloween antics and New Years Eve partying. Having a pretty sweet paying job helps too. Later world and a couple cans of Coke.

A taste of Mad Men

In the words of Professor Farnsworth, “GOOD NEWS EVERYONE!”

Indeed it was. Today I was interviewed at a very big name, we are a big deal, Mad Men-level ad agency right in the heart of Pasadena. The amazing thing is I inquired about open positions about a month ago and I miraculously got a call back for an interview by the founder. I knew this interview was going to be unusual considering I didn’t actually apply for a position. How did it go you may be asking? Just okay. I honestly don’t think I landed a job there and that’s just the reality of it. It wasn’t the best interview I’ve given, but considering the short amount of years I’ve been working and the chance I was given to meet with people who manage clients in the quarter-of-a-million dollar level, I’m quite happy and joyful this was even a reality.

Having my first taste of Men Mad in the 21st century only makes the drive to reach this position more real, closer, and addictive even. Obstacles will exist, but I will stop at nothing to get to where my interviewers are.

Remember the time I worked at Hulu? Hint: I did. Crazy right? I was interviewed at an IT company located in Long Beach. I unfortunately accepted my old marketing job before I could schedule my 2nd interview with them. Guess who called to see if I was available… YEAH. No f-cking way this was all in the same day. Now that begs the question: continue with marketing and make okay money, or do IT, drive further, longer, and make great money?

Here’s a picture of Pasadena from tonight. Dirt cheap milk tea and egg rolls lead to a trip to Old Town with the homie (+G as my sis would say).

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Tomorrow I start my new job and heck, I don’t even have to drive to get there in time. Braving the buses to save money… I think I’m definitely an adult now. Later world and a can of Coke.

Stage plays and party days

Last weekend (Saturday to be exact), we went to my best friend, Garza’s stage play. For the record, his name is Jonathan, but he strictly goes on a last name basis. Calling him Jonathan is just plain weird, but Garza is no better if I think about it. I would describe him as a redneck hillbilly if you haven’t already heard his Mexican accent (don’t worry, he knows this and can take a joke). I actually knew who he was long before we ever met. I recall hearing a friend shouting his name in the hallway back in freshman year of high school. For said play, we made our way to ELAC—like the Aflac duck, but with more EEE. It’s a community college with a big fat lie in its name, stating it’s in East LA, but actually resides in Monterey Park. Yes—Monterey Park, the second most heavy populated city of Asians in all of the United States. Factoid. Confused? So am I. If you’re ever in town, try turning around anywhere and not seeing someone who’s Asian. You can’t. Ha. Tickets to the play were free (courtesy of Garza) so why not support my best friend in his flourishing (and quite serious) acting career?

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I can describe this play as Judas meets West Coast rap with a pimp acting as the devil… of course, right? The gentleman who played the devil wore a red velvet coat and a long “walking stick” COUGH pimp stick. He had the most villainous laugh you could of imagined. Definitely on the calibre of a nefarious Hollywood villain. Impressed I was.

After party shenanigans

We were all told this one play was a culmination of 6 entire months of work and preparation, so when Garza said he was itching to blow off some steam and get hammered, taking an Uber seemed the most logical (not to mention responsible route). The party was no different than any other party I’ve been too. Highlights for that part of the night: Garza danced himself into a sweaty shiny mess. For someone who pushes the scales, he definitely can get down when his mood is elevated above the clouds (with special assistance of course). Our gallon of water was refilled twice in the few hours we were there.

Ubers and Lyfts at 3 AM

You know whats great when everyone is too f-ed up to drive at night? Uber and Lyft! You know what those services are like at 3AM? IT’S IMPOSSIBLE TO BOOK A RIDE. Four Lyft drivers canceled on us. It wasn’t until we desperately tried Uber that someone went on the freeway to come pick us up from the corner of a busy main street. Four guys talking and slurring loudly on the corner is definitely definitely not shady at all in the middle of the night.

Just another day of antics and tomfoolery. Later folks and a bottle of Coke.

Adventures in not smoking

One subject I’m not proud of is my relationship with cigarettes or stogs as my friends and I usually call them when we’re out. While I did quit for the better part of ten entire months from last year, getting laid off has made those sticks of tobacco that much more a necessity as I navigate the life of the unemployed. Fun fact and not surprisingly: it sucks. Every now and again, I like to joke around how I’m actually “cutting back”.

If I was SpongeBob, Patrick is my friend Julian

For smokers this means one of two things. One, “I’m bullshitting you”. Two, “I’m smoking less”. I guess you can consider me somewhere in-between those two statements with a splash of humor thrown in. See, I use to smoke two packs a day and only the blacks as my friends and I call them. That’s smokers talk for being badass and smoking heavy flavored tobacco around the clock. Now, I only smoke one pack every two days. By any stretch of the imagination, that is still ridiculous and a future train wreck waiting to happen upon my poor lungs and whatever nicotine throws down my insides.

How do I feel now you might ask? Absolutely tired and sleepy. If I had energy, it surely wasn’t around for too long. My body feels a lot like that fatigue you get from a hard night of partying and dancing, minus the hangover and lingering smell of vodka in the room of course. How did Don Draper do this is beyond me. I’m not a fan of old fashions and whiskey, but give me a fancy suit, skinny tie, and slicked back hair any day. As a broom-riding witch says, “Oh my stars”.

Tomorrow is day two. I’m terrified of that statement.

Later world and a can of Coke.

That time I was let go from my job

In what can be one of the most jarring experiences I can recall this past year, I was without warning let go from my job as a web project manager. While this would normally bother me to no end, let me tell you how the day-to-day operations was like at REDACTED. For those skillful Internet searchers, the company I worked for is located in Los Angeles. We only recently moved there the beginning of September from a small city just by the border of South Pasadena. We cleverly advertise a “full internet marketing” agency when we in fact outsource to India for a majority of the work. Yelp reviews are a resounding 5 stars across the board, but strangely only date back to 2014 and without a negative review to be found. The lowercase e in our name lets our clients know we’re all about the Internet and not afraid to boast our rankings as “one of the top SEOs”.

I promise there’s only a hint of sarcasm in that description.

Refunds (or lack of thereof)

If you were one of the unlucky few who were magically called upon by one of our sales people and lured into the unforgiving trap we set forth on your credit card, getting you the website you wanted was far from our priority. Deadlines often ran far into the third month when we quoted customers a turnaround time of just 1-2. What if you wanted a refund, you might ask? We don’t give out refunds. Ever. Keeping you on billing was skillfully executed by our most seasoned managers who knew how to keep clients relatively happy with little to no work to show for it. If there was a billing mistake and you were commonly overcharged you would recieve additional months of service. That only begs the question: If the service is free, does that make it good? Nope.

Lackluster Communication

Take a large company with many departments who don’t regularly coordinate communication with each other and what do you end up with? A huge cluster fuck of “I didn’t know.” and “Oh did they?”. I heard that more times than was considered normal. If a client requested a change in service, I never trusted my email to magically make it to the right hands or monitors or even have it properly forwarded to the right people as protocol would dictate. Might I remind you that our “new process”—as one jolly gentle project manager put it—was an incredible fifty pages in length. As thorough and well written in formalities as the language on bounded paper was, this “new process” was more of a front for the amount of half-assed shenanigans that was regularly going on.

The People

Lastly, come my thoughts on the people working there. Not everyone who worked there was a quack. In fact, there were a select few who rightfully earned their places high up in the company. Guys in billing, and the big boss lady are the best examples that I know of who had every right to each letter of their title. However, look down a few rows and you couldn’t help but notice the high school students in social media who laughed and chuckled every time you caught them walking through the hallway. Better yet, my own manager (who I shall not name) was every bit a kid in disguise with a troubling past and more run-ins with the law than one could reasonably laugh at.

To end this on a positive note, see ya M___, M____, and V____. Those three people weren’t just my co-workers who sat beside me. I can honestly say without a doubt they were also my friends—and that is something I will truly miss about not working there. Laughs were shared, crazy and wild stories were exchanged, and just a little bit of ourselves rubbed off on one another to make a small difference.

So long, farewell, and a can of Coke.