Getting older has many positives. You tend to see the world with a different perspective and you’re less naive — meaning you see right through bullshit. It’s great. Not taking everything at face value means you can take care of yourself and not be so easily manipulated.
I tend to freak out seeing all the signs of aging time slowly but surely brings. My hair is getting grayer. My body feels more tired after a long week and I definitely can’t get away with eating bad anymore. Next month, I have my usual eye exam to see if I’m inching towards having glaucoma. The thought is more terrifying than the actual examination. Is it no wonder people have more anxiety nowadays?
The other week it hit me I’m at the lowest amount of debt I’ve had since 2013, which honestly sounds kind of sad. The cost of education started this long drawn out process of repayments and interest rates, but it was worth it. Learning to have a strong focus and determination is something valuable lifelong. Was it worth it? Hell yes.
I somehow live in the present, but my mind is stuck wandering into the past. It’s nice to see how far I’ve come, but perhaps I need to stop day dreaming. I’m awake, but I’m dreaming. I’m quietly working, but my mind is shouting. My mouth makes words, but I have more to say.