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Take Control

8 AM. It’s raining. It’s chilly. And I’m feeling quite relaxed. I’ve been fond of fainfall for as long as I can remember.

Last month, two of my co-workers were let go — a la fired. I can describe them as two guys who didn’t have their shit together. My boss was too generous in making accommodations for them — going as far to change the pay schedule for everyone so they could get their checks one to two days earlier. My only gripe is those who were paid salary, like myself, get a tiny less — whatever. I’ve heard a lot of complaints from these two. How their current situation was less than perfect. How the wife and him were arguing, fighting, and barely getting by with two incomes. One had a baby — which only made the situation that much more dire. In our usual office banter between guys, one told me how he would leave her in a second if he could reconnect with his past girl friend. I hear a lot of things — this one however rubs me the wrong way. Seems very selfish when you have a child in the mix. I believe it’s no longer about what you want anymore. You’re doing it for your child. Don’t be stupid.

I’ve been a firm believer everyone is in control of their own lives. That every action lead you up to this point in your life. What you did set you up for where you are now. No one pushed you in the direction you headed. You are the pilot and this is where it landed you. Most I feel complain a great deal. As if that would make things magically better. Personal responsibility seems to take a back seat when life is not what you hoped it to be. I chalk that up to bad decision making, an unwillingness to admit fault, and throwing the blame to external factors.

A lot of the guys at the office look up to me. They say I’m some kind of inspiration to them. It’s nice to hear, but was never the intent when I tell my past experiences and stories. One or two said they wish they could have what I have. Really? Then just take it. I’m usually at a loss for words when I hear this. I think what separates me from them is I’m willing to say I fucked up — and a lot. I recall when and where, and hope I don’t make those same mistakes a second time. It’s an uphill battle in some sense. A little progress is better than no progress. If my determination and motivation is inspirational, it’s only a side effect of owning up to my mistakes.

For these reasons, I do believe that anyone can do anything they put their mind to. If there’s enough effort, willingness, motivation, etc. I wouldn’t see why everything wouldn’t fall into place. Right out of high school I was beyond lost, but in retrospect, I gave up on life. It set me back a couple years, but I eventually made up for it. I would consider where I am now the fruits of my labor. Staying grounded is much easier when you know where you’re coming from.

Everything you want is right in front of you. Just go out and reach it.

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