Sedation is a wonderful feeling. You stop thinking for those few fledgling moments. It’s Zen. It’s calming. Yet, it comes back with a vengeance. It’s a trade off. Feel composed yet feel the wrath of the aftermath and whatever lingering effects sweet lady courage brings. In that sense, you never really break free. You want more of it. It’s reach is all encompassing and controlling. Son of a bitch. Quitting is difficult, but as they say, old habits die hard.