And Beyond

As a whole, this year has been great. I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it for all the ups and few downs it brought me. I think what separates this year from the previous ones was much I focused on self-improvement and self-care. The last few years, it all took a backseat in my mind and wasn’t quite as serious. Giving up alcohol had it’s own set of challenges and critisims from friends and co-workers, but the one year mark is in sight. I’m relieved and delighted I’ve made it this far.

I’ve come to realize, my best friends are my ride or die, and although every one of them has their own set of challenges to face, they truly are one of a kind. I’m happy we’ve been together as a group for so long and somehow always find the time to catch up. It’s rare, but not impossible. I love blunt honesty, but sometimes, with the best intentions, my friends are more likely to tell me what I want to hear than the reality of things. This isn’t a ding on them in any way. We’re all brothers with the same thoughts, so it’s inevitable when a serious talk comes up.

It’s all the more reason to be mindful of yourself. Some problems I’ve faced, I had to take a step back and go through it with my own admission. In a sense, it’s the only proper way to address any problem or issue someone faces. You have to realize it first before someone steps in to say it. I think it’s only natural you might take offense to any critisims thrown your way — friends or not.

I think one of the best feelings is overcoming your inner demons with some helpful advice from your friends or family. Not everyone can be so willing to lay it on them and confide privately without a few obstacles and hesitations. My rule is and always has been, if they’re truly my friends, I should be able to tell them anything without fear of rejection or harsh judgement. It holds true especially this year and for that, I’m always thankful they’re around when I need them.

There’s just a couple weeks left and I’m really forward to closing out the year and having a fresh start. Lives only move in one direction — forward and I hope everything that happened this year is a lession learned or a new perspective worth exploring. I’m far from feeling complete or content, but I’m getting there. If the sun rises and sets every day and the moon is still in the night sky, then tomorrow will come.

I’ve come up with a list of what I want to complete for 2019 and hope this keeps me busy. The worst I think anyone can do is just go about the year being stagnant. There’s always the potential for more and something new worth pursuing, so I rather firmly reach out and grab all that life has to offer. My outlook never changes and optimistim will still be central to my perspective on life.

Something I’ve come to realize is just how much I take for granted the little things I do. Not having a car the past couple weeks has grounded me at home. Being able to just go to my favorite coffee shop and sit down to stare out onto the street sounds unremarkable, but relieves a lot of stress. It drains out all my thoughts and gets work off my mind for the few hours I spend there. Thankfully, I just have to wait it out for a few more days before I’m mobile again.

I’m hopeful next year I get better at not saying anything. No one this year said anything remotely offensive to me, but I feel not every comment I made so far was a comment needed. It’s hard to explain, but sometimes you just need to let someone run their mouth and smile back. Let people vent and say whatever they need to say and leave it at that. Anything more would just be wasted time and effort.

My year wasn’t perfect by any means. For all the downs it had, I tend to mostly gravitate and remember all the positives it brought. I met new people, dated a few, got to know them really well, heard them talk about their own experiences and what makes them tick. It’s one of the best parts in my opinion about life. I got to reconnect with old friends that I haven’t seen in ages and with all the years that went by, felt like it was only yesterday I last saw them.

There’s much to do still and a lot to look forward to. I’m ready for 2019 and I sure am excited. Later world.

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