In my experience, long distance relationships are immensely difficult and time consuming with everything you have going on. Lives that were once intertwined suddenly run separately, which puts a lot of strain on the relationship. Sure, there are other ways to keep in touch with texting the easiest option, a phone call everyday, or a Skype call when it’s convenient, but it’s never the same as face to face. Not having your significant other there physically is challenging. There’s no better thing than a big hug from the person you hold most dear to.

I tried and failed miserably at this during college and thinking back, if I wasn’t hundreds of miles from Los Angeles, things would have played out differently. Hindsight is 20/20, as some would say. My ex-girl friend never found phone or Skype calls enough and I don’t blame her or anyone who feels the same way. I was busy with school, classes, social clubs, and trying to start a new life in a different city. Priorities shifted. We texted constantly, in between classes, on break periods, eating lunch etc. There’s only so much digital communication can accomplish. I remember marking on my calendar the days remaining until I can go back home and pay her a much needed visit. It sucks to miss someone and doesn’t change as the days go by.

We planned it out. Keep in touch as much as we can and allowed time, since we’d be together the following year. It’s nice to hear and think about, but in my case, it never happened. She was to transfer to SB and move in with me my senior year. It was a plan, but a poorly thought out one at best. The biggest issue I ran into was how to handle normal run-of-the-mill “fights” every couple faces. If you have a disagreement and mainly talk over text, meanings aren’t properly conveyed without the tone of a voice. A phone call helps, but facial cues are missing. Skype calls are the best of both worlds, but no one wants to start yelling at their MacBook late into the night.

After giving this my best for a couple months, I knew this wasn’t sustainable. Moving away took a lot of what I took for granted. What was easy to resolve became difficult. Hugs and real affection were lost and replaced with silly emojis. Yet, I’m glad I broke it off in the end. The best any guy can can do is realize you can’t give her what she wants and end it amicably. Break ups hurt like no other, but some times you have to realize this can’t go on.

Later world.


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