The sky was a dark shade of grey and the sun the most unusual orange glow. It’s quite the spectacle. I needed this. I’m feeling so much better compared to yesterday. I’m thankful I have such great friends to help me snap out of it. We established a new rule today: tell me no.
Although unrelated to my previous thoughts from yesterday, I call this post “Reality Check”.
I think our existence in this world is the one thought all of man refuses to contemplate. It’s a terrifying thought to wonder why we exist at all. What purpose we have here in the short time we are alive? Is there some special reason we are alive in this world on this time of this day of this year? How we are born is the stuff of miracles. We are all winners in that sense. We get to enjoy the natural beauty all around us. There’s no better time to be alive than right now. I fear not living. I fear not living up to my potential. The need for now and not later. Say everything that needs be said and regret not having the chance later on. This is inevitable the longer you hold back.
Not many can accept that fact that in life, the ones you care about and hold true to your heart will be the first to go. It’s an unapologetic and tragic chapter of existence. We regret not making time for the ones we wanted to be with when they are alive — death is always certain and only a matter when. How you handle such unspeakable pain in seeing them go is up for debate. Grieving is needed. Tears are necessary. Pain is a part of life. Without it, we can never really appreciate anything or anyone. Joy wouldn’t feel so good if it wasn’t for pain.
Heartbreak has a special chapter in everyone. If you’re lucky to meet just one woman and find her to be the one, consider yourself lucky. Most first loves are just that — a test for what’s really to come later on. It’s the feelings romance novels, poetry, and movies are made from. True, real, and raw first love is overwhelming, and overpowering. It consumes you. Makes you have butterflies in your stomach, and overtakes your thoughts. Yet, first love or teenage love never lasts. You two are too young, naive, and foolish — not yet ready for the road that lies ahead. The path to commitment and the road to adulthood is best served alone. Only you can find yourself. She does not make the man. The man find his own path in the field of uncertainty and darkness. Never say you are incomplete without her. A woman merely complements the man — never making him whole. Don’t be so foolish.
I often wish I was the man I am now, but back then. She would of loved the new me — a more refined and polished persona. You can say it’s what she was really looking for, but you had yet to reach that point. No one can fast forward life nor slow it down. There is no playback button or rewind — no matter how desperately we wish we did. To have the ability to time travel forwards and back is just that — day dreaming.
To all the men in the world who have unrequited love — let go. If you gave it a chance and an attempt at having a place in her heart and she does not reciprocate — at least you know she’s not interested. Had you not given it a go, you may live forever in regret. Men call it the one that got away — such experiences are only shared when intoxicated and inebriated among your closest of brothers. I love the chase — perhaps more so than the actual time spent together or relationship we dream of. Effort is needed. Planning is required. How you execute makes a lasting impression on her. If she feels the same and a relationship fosters, then what a catch.
Stay weary of the road ahead of you. She may never be 100% what you want — I find that improbable. No one is perfect because we all grow old and change over time. I’m not that same person from one year ago. How can she be any different? Two people in love must accept the fact changes in personality, character, charm, etc are certain. If you can accept this fact then you risk not being disappointed or falling out of love.
Add as many chapters to your life to find personal fulfillment. Every person is a book waiting to be opened, read, and critiqued. If yours seems short, get up and do something about it. Modern living is all too often sedentary and lacking in motivation. We are glued to our phones all day and worry too much about our online image when actual reality is what matters.
Find what makes you happy. Search your feelings. Everyone knows what makes them unhappy, then find a way to undo that. Relationship building is essential and I consider it an absolute necessity for personal happiness. Not everyone you know brings welcoming feelings — they’re best dropped and not worth your time. I rather have a few real friends than hundreds of fake ones. I think everyone can agree. The few you can depend on at any time far out weigh being popular.