We are constantly in battle with our two selves — the light and the dark. Good and evil. The angel on one end and the devil on the other. Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. I know this to be true because we have all done wrong at one point. Evil is a necessary force driving reality. We strive to be more good than bad — however intrinsically true that may be. Most only show one side of themselves — think of Facebook as the best example. It’s essentially your friend’s greatest hits in digitally digestible form. We forget they only show the best of them and it’s far from a true representation of their real lives.
The greatest evil one faces is the battle you and yourself. Who am I? I can pinpoint various states of myself. One year I was this person, a studious, and hard working individual. Another, I was reckless, disillusioned, and overcome with fear of the looming end that awaited — that feeling of emptiness lurking within. My co-workers know this to be true. They hear of the old self and wonder how this person is presented in front of them — a real far cry from the past. This isn’t without its consequences.
There’s who I am now battling against who I once was — its a state of constant unrest in the mind. Perhaps many sleepless nights and states of insomnia can be attributed to this dilemma. Only you can chose who you are, yet the old self is hard to let go, but not invincible. You can be anything you want to be, but for some it’s,
“I’ll be anything you want me to be.”
It begs the question, “Am I how I am now because I want to be or of what others think I should be?” Issues of self identity are constantly on the horizon. To make a name for yourself and to be somebody now rather than later is important. It makes the mundane have purpose as every action is now purposeful and with merit.
I wear many masks. Some more than others.