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Next Stop: Blind Ambition

If you look at how some people preoccupy their time, you’d think most men are lost in their journey through life. Video games, drinking, smoking, vaping, and drugs are just vices to kill time. I hate that phrase “to kill time”. There’s really nothing more special than the ultimate luxury. Every fucking second matters and I wouldn’t want it go to waste or cannibalize it. Have goals and find ways to reach them. It’s an attractive quality to have as a man after all. How can anyone go on living not knowing what they want this minute, this hour, this day, this week, this month, this year? The very thought infuriates me to no end.

That is the paradox of living. We get too comfortable going with the flow and before you know it, time is forever lost. I think that’s what some consider the mid-life crisis. I’d be damned if I ever let that happen to myself. If you spend enough time contemplating life, you’ll have a list of what isn’t to your satisfaction and a general idea of how to reach or fix them — goals.

goals: the object of a person’s ambition or effort; an aim or desired result

Some men consider setting goals as an easy way to become disappointed. You risk not meeting them. Bullshit. There are infinitely more topics to be disappointed in than not meeting goals. If you start with that type of mindset — a la defeated, you’ll never fucking make it in this world. Anything is possible and it’s never out of reach.

You can safely assume ambition and goals go hand and hand. If one is ambitious, goals can be attained. What to make of blind ambition then?

Blind ambition is when ambition prevents people from seeing what’s happening around them. Sometimes we need to block out what is happening around us in order to do what seems impossible.

I can assume a large portion of my ambition is blind. I honestly will stop at nothing to reach them. Relationships will suffer. You put yourself over everyone else and that’s just what it takes. I know my PCC days royally fucked up my relationship with the guys, but in the end, I graduated, got my 3 associates and transferred the fuck out of there to paradise. It was bitter sweet. It takes a level of obsession and fixation to get where you want to be. Call it being selfish as Mayra puts it. We only have one life and if you can’t go on living knowing you gave 100%, then why are you even trying?

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